02/04/2007 
8 Comment(s)Techology, addiction and rape
I'm in a rush... in fact I'm in so much of a rush I don't have time to spellcheque (pun intended... haha.. ha.. ahem).
Since moving house I have been metaphorically raped by a decidedly large cucumber. Not by the government with their astronomically high taxes, nor by my fifty-something year old female solicitor whose name I cannot quite remember. I've been raped by B-fookin-T and their shitty excuse of a telephone service. How is a 21st century guy supposed to survive for 2 weeks without the internet whilst they swap over the connection to his/her new house? It stinks. It stinks like something brown on the underside of your nice new Nike Air trainer.
I tell ya what it does do though. It makes you realise just how totally reliant we (or should that be "I"?) are on communications and our modern day technology. John Phillips wrote about it a few months ago, and I'm sure you sad lot of loosers who read this blog and are obviously techno-junkies like me (proud looser extrodinare) are in agreement.
Gimmi back my goddamn internet British Telecom, before I kneecap ya!!!
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On 8th of September 2006 Kate said:
Thank **** (insert sweary word ) It's not just me that wants to harm BT right now!
39 days I've been waiting to port/sort the ADSL in my new home... Now, please excuse me, I have a mildly abusive email to send (via dial-up *argh*) to BT's elbow department. :(
On 9th of September 2006 J Phill said:
Thanks for the plug! Yeah the internet is priceless. I bought a Motorola Q a few months ago, so I have internet on the go now in case of emergencies, like checking rss feeds :).
On 9th of September 2006 Spencer said:
Hillarious article :-D. Im the same. I just cant live without the internet, or my xbox for that matter :-)
Services here are just as bad im always left waiting when I move house.
On 15th of September 2006 lorissa said:
i'm going through the exact same thing right now so i feel your pain. although, i think a cucumber is far too nice. it's more like a pineapple.
apparently we have 1 more week to endure. we'll see. i'm not holding my breath.
On 16th of September 2006 Steve Tucker said:
Good luck lorissa!